Baby, I Miss Your Face

My heart is still as full of love for you, as it’s always been, my love. 

But the house is so empty without you.

You never made much noise, but it is so deafeningly quiet here now, without hearing you breathe or move around on your bed. I was used to hearing every move you made, every breath you took.

I miss how you flopped on your side when I approached you and how you stretched out at my touch. I miss burying my face in your fur, feeling your warmth. I miss feeling your silky fur under my hands. I miss your smell.

I miss feeling your presence.

Somehow it still feels as if you were here, except I know you're not.

I miss how you would run between my legs to get a bum massage. I miss how much you liked ear rubs. I miss how you let me hug you and wrap my hands around your neck.

I miss how your head popped up and ears perked up in anticipation of good things.

I miss how excited you got every time you were to go somewhere. I miss how you loved your morning and nightly patrols. I miss how excited you got before your walks. You waited patiently but when it was time, it was time. You’d come to the office, sit down and stare with anticipation. Then you’d swat me or pushed your head under my hand when I wasn’t taking the hint. You jumped up when the thought of a walk merely crossed our minds. You always knew what we were thinking.

I miss your kind heart and your loyalty. I miss how you always had to know where I was and what I was doing. I miss how no matter how much fun you’d have outside with the furry biped, when it started to get dark, you wanted to go back to mommy.

I miss how lighthearted and care-free you were with me around.

I miss the tricks you pulled to get your own way. I miss your curiosity and your beautiful smart mind. I miss your determination.

I miss how you loved being outside in the woods, at the farm, or at your ranch. I miss your happiness and zest for life you always had. I loved nothing more than watching you having a good time, being happy, enjoying things.

I miss how you took up most of the couch when we all cuddled at night.

I miss giving you good things you would enjoy. I miss how happy it made me every time you enjoyed your meal; we never took that for granted with you.

I miss the times we played together. I loved being not just your mom, but your buddy. I miss swimming and running and playing with you.

I miss spoiling you rotten.

I miss all the work we did to take care of you. Yes, I even miss busting the ice outside so you couldn’t slip.

I miss talking to you, and I know you were listening. It was particularly apparent when you didn't know what I was saying and I could see you trying to figure it out.

Baby, I miss your face. 

***

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